Monthly Intention: JOY
Hello my darlings!
Let’s be honest, February is normally a pretty blue month for most people, especially the way things are right now and considering there will be no snow birding (for those of us in the cold wintery Northern Hemisphere). Last month we talked about looking into our Truth as opposed to resolutions that sometimes are not long standing. This month I want us to talk about Joy.
I know Joy can be a scary word for most of us. If I’m too joyful [this] or [that], or I don’t live in a world of unicorns and rainbows, or any excuse you can find not to be joyful, I can promise I used it too!
What is joy?
Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines joy as:
the emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires (delight)
the expression or exhibition of such emotion (gaiety)
a state of happiness or felicity (bliss)
a source or cause of delight
Reading that leaves me with flashbacks of reading the building code; vague, generalized, all encompassing, and up to your own interpretation. So if joy is really such a broad definition, why does such a short simple word cause us so much pain. We struggle to find “success”, “a state of happiness”, or “well-being”.
In my interpretation, joy can be anything that gives you a sense of happiness and fulfilment. Let’s remove the consumerism (possessing what one desires) and pressure (good fortune, or success). You do not always have to “find joy” in big things, you can let joy find you in the smaller moments of your day. Maybe “possessing what one desires” is a feeling instead of an object or item. Maybe I desire a feeling of satisfaction or fulfilment, fun and freedom.
So how can I let joy find me?
I may sound like a broken record saying this, but be open to it! Simply be open to receiving joy. Why do you have that cup of coffee in the morning? Is it habit? You “need it”? Part of your routine? Does it bring you joy? Can it bring you joy? Who says that… Marie Kondo, right? Do things spark joy? If not, get rid of them - to be honest I haven’t watched anything of hers, but I love the concept! Does drinking my coffee in the morning bring me joy? No, then get rid of it and try something else. Maybe not having that coffee has made space in your life / morning for something else, something that does bring you joy like a 5 minute gua sha or abhyanga, journaling, meditating or breathwork. If you are open and aware to your desire for joy, you will start to have joy find you in the simplest of places. Like the day I was out for a walk, turned around and saw the sun shining through the trees (above photo), my foot prints the only ones in fresh snow, the crisp air, the calm peaceful sounds after a fresh snowfall. Everything about that moment brought me joy, and that was over 3 weeks ago! I can still think about that moment and have that sense of joy envelop me, be transported back to that moment when I look at the photo. And that joyous, somewhat life changing moment, took less than 30 seconds on my walk to experience. What if drinking your morning coffee could bring you that much happiness, love and fulfilment. Could you feel that way about other moments too?
Why are we fearful of joy?
In today’s society its almost frowned upon to be genuinely happy. If you are, people honestly think something is wrong with you, or that you are faking it. So I understand, why would you want to be joyous, or even use the word joy. How do you feel even reading these words in your head? Triggered, annoyed, eye roll? Do you have an inner story that says you are not worthy of joy? Remember, the Universe is against me, I’m afraid of being happy because something bad will inevitably happen after. How can we separate our fear and that story? I think I said it before so I will say it again, STOP LOOKING FOR THE BAD THING, stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. If you look for it, it will find you. I say this to you out of love and experience, just stop looking and waiting.
The joyful or joy-filled mindset
For the month of February I invite you to challenge your story. I invite you to be open to joy, let joy seek you out. And do not be fearful of the repercussions, because they are none existent, that is just another story you are telling yourself to keep you small. I invite you to take joy in the activities you are performing throughout the day. When you wake up in the morning, instead of starting your mental to do list, and bashing yourself, hating getting out of bed, hating your job, partner, kids, pet, family, co-workers, whatever else goes through your mind, try starting your day with our affirmation for the month: I am worthy of all the love and fulfilment this life has to offer. I am joy. Write it in your journal, screen shot it from our instagram and use as your phones wallpaper, write it on a sticky note. Set yourself up to be successful for the day. Maybe the “success” in the definition, is mental, emotional or spiritual success, embracing a positive mindset and well-being. Maybe we have been misinterpreting it all along to mean that societal and professional success is the only option for us.
So I ask you, and invite you to journal on it (if you are into that):
what does my joy look like?
can I be joyful without feeling guilty?
am I afraid of joy? why?
Once you are aware of these inner stories you are able to look at them objectively, you are able to remove the power they may have over you, and more importantly you are taking the first step to healing them. If you need help and support recognizing and working through your inner stories, have a look at our inner story healing sessions.
Until next time…